The bariatric journey is filled with many paths, roads and directions that can take us where we are going. We get to make the choice in what direction we will turn. Some take a scenic route, and some chose to walk with their friends, and some even chose to make a couple of loops on the trail. The great things we all get to chose our way home.
January 6th is the day of Epiphany… some call it 3 kings day. Personally I call it the day of the Wise Man. That’s because it’s my grandfathers birthday and today marks the 100th anniversary of his birth.
Following in my grandfathers footsteps I am trying to walk on the journey of wisdom. There is a LOT to learn.
I want to talk about my bariatric journey today and share some of the things I am facing in my journey. At 7 1/2 years post op, there is definitely some regain noted. It is important that I look at this realistically. Facts are I am 40 years old and I like having curves, I have had 2 children and am not looking at being “skinny” anytime soon.
When I first had surgery I strived for that 110 pound number on the scale, but it is not a realistic goal. My reality is a goal of somewhere between 140-150 pounds and I am 5’1″ so I think that is doable and I also think it is realistic. I want to achieve this goal before 2012. So that gives me about a year to meet the goal and if I get there early my goal will be re-evaluated to maintaining that number.
In order to achieve this goal, I must first look at what has gotten me to a place of regain. There are a couple of factors that I recognize immediately.
1. Lack of exercise. ~Going to the gym or running a marathon is not my cup of coffee, however realistically in the last few months my activity level dwindled. I want to say that part of this is due to some depression and sedimentary lifestyle I have adapted since I became unemployed and starting focusing more on school. That would be just an excuse if I said it though, there is no reason why I couldn’t be out there walking or doing something everyday to get my heart rate up and going. So, I am going to not criticize myself for what I could have done (notice I didn’t way SHOULD) and I am going to focus on changing it.
2. Stress~ Lets face it stress does effect my eating and it also keeps me awake at night. My metabolism suffers when this happens. In the last couple of months I have been stressing about looking for work, paying bills ect, and I am going to change my view and make this an adventure. I am looking and seeking career opportunities that will broaden my life and allow me to learn and grow. Lately I have applied for some interesting careers including marketing for a home health company. Since I have worked the past 5 years in bariatrics I just imagined I would always, but there maybe its time to see how the rest of the world works. I have even thought about going back to college, think about that. Here I am a 40 year old grandmother, I wonder what college would be like?What would I major in?
3. Diet~ My diet has evolved to being that of vegetarian, and I eat good healthy foods. My problem has been that I stress eat. So when I am anxious I eat even when I am not hungry. Time to pull out a food journal and keep track of everything that goes in my mouth.
4.Negativity~ I have allowed some negative thoughts to creep into my life. Thinking about what I don’t have instead of being thankful for all that I have including my health, family, friends and my positive strong qualities. Gratitude and positive thinking shall fill my cup.
Jill wrote in her blog about tracking down negative thoughts and challenged us to see if we can track ours down to? I am stepping up to that challenge.
My quest is for balance. Balance in all areas of my life.
1. Exercise that raises my heart rate and gets the positive vibrations going out to the world in a rippling effect.
2. Balanced Nutrition that focuses on my bariatric guidelines yet honors my vegetarian path. It can be done.
3. Balanced Emotional health that allows me to acknowledge my feeling even when they hurt and let them go…. so that I can feel up with positive thoughts.