Do you remember where you where on that fateful day 9-11-2001?
For me it’s like that day is embedded in my heart, and the memory will always be there. It was during my morning medication pass. I was working on 3-South at BRMC and I had 8 telemetry patients. I was in room 354 giving medications to a male patient (I even remember his name) and he had his TV on. I stood speechless as I watched the planes crash into the trade center buildings one at the time. My patient cried out “HELP US GOD!”.
Still, I stood there speechless, dumping the cup of pills into his bed. I tried to gather them up and confort him then hurry to the nursing station where the other nurses would soon gather. I did not have one family member in those crashes, yet I felt connected to each and every victim that day. It’s times like that our nation comes together and no matter what our beliefs, or our political affiliation we STAND together to support our country.
That day all I could think about while I was at work was getting home to my children. Megan was 10 and Leesa was 9, and as a mother I just wanted to hold them and let them know I loved them. However, if you have ever worked in a medical or healthcare setting you know, times like 9-1-1 are called Code D for disaster and you can’t leave without walking away from your job.
I completed my shift, and learned that day that my husband the time was having an affair and 9-1-1 was his girlfriends birthday. Now, looking back I completely understand why he didn’t have time for me when I called him to tell him how this was upsetting me and could he please go get the kids at school.
The events of that day 10 years ago all combined set me spinning in a whirlwind of depression. I was 385 pounds, and misreable. The next couple of weeks were spent watching CNN, FOX News and MSNBC every single moment that I was not at work. My depression really grew and I went into one of the darkest winters of my life. THAT, and I didn’t have family members that were directly involved in the situation. I can’t even begin to imagine how people who were there or people who lived in NYC were effected by this.
Earlier in April I was in NYC and while I did not visit the site of ground zero, I was flooded with many thoughts and feeling about that time 10 years ago. I never imagined we would be hearing this news today.
Tonight as I listened to President Obama give the speech that Osama Bin Laden is dead, and I watched the screen on FB nearly explode with FB updates regarding “Osama is Dead” I realize that on some level Justice has been done and we can put some of this behind us. There is such a huge gathering of energy regarding this announcement. Cheering in the streets of NYC, post after post of cheering on FB.
What I can’t lose sight of is the people who lost their lives that day, the amount of panic and fear that went out that day from people all over the world worrying about their loved ones or fellow Americans. The feeling of being violated as a country and using our own aircraft as Weapons of Mass Destruction that blanketed us as a nation. For me, it’s not a cheer I want to do, I want to have some moments of silence in rememberence of the people affected and who lost their lives that day. I want to sit in silence and send love and peaceful thoughts to those military people who are putting their lives at risk everyday for this country and the people here.
My mind tells me this is a good thing, and that 10 years of anger, hate, and grieving is finally coming to an end. My heart tells me to be aware that this is not the end. That there is a huge possibility of martrydom retalliations that might follow.
I am thankful that so many who lost loved ones are able to have this closure. Closure is so important to us as humans.
When I Think about it Hitler committed suicide April 30, 1945 and declared dead May 1, 1945 and to this day 66 years later the world is still effected by the hate and the murders that Hitler carried out.
So, I am taking a deep breathe tonight and I am sending out love and positive energy and I hope that you will join me.
Do you remember where you were that day? Did you have loved ones who were directly effected by the terroist attacks? Do you have family in the military or armed services?? What feelings are you experiencing with the news of the death of Osama Bin Laden? Do you feel at peace or do you have fears of retalliation? Share your thoughts, please.